Owen's Birth Story

On the 18th of September 2020, not long after the clock ticked over from midnight to morning, I gave birth to my beautiful son Owen Sequoia. This is our story.

Labour Part One

Monday the 7th of September - 38 weeks pregnant

The first week of Spring. I was romantically hoping that my baby would arrive at the beginning of Spring - to mark the change of season, and to further revel in the beauty of everything that had begun to bloom around us.

I had been experiencing braxton hicks waves fairly consistently from 36 weeks, however this time they were not stopping - but getting longer, stronger and closer together. My birth team was called to come support, in the early hours of the morning. My mum, my midwife Janine, and my photographer Hannah, made their way over on the misty Monday morning.

My beautiful husband Matt was already in my ‘zone’... reminding me of my calm breath, massaging my arms and head, keeping me hydrated, and making my space feel safe and secure. At one point I leaned forward onto all fours and sat up like a gorilla. In that moment I felt strong, powerful, and fierce as the waves came over my body. I was calm, I was in control, I felt ABLE to birth.

I stayed in that ‘zone’ for longer still. Janine and Matt blew up the birth pool, my hand selected spotify playlist was humming in the background, my mum was quietly supporting me through each wave... But as the hours passed it was seeming that my waves were starting to space out and lose their intensity. Janine offered to do an internal exam - to help guide our next steps. I agreed, and was overjoyed to know my body had brought my cervix to 4cm dilated. I was in established labour. I was so close to meeting my baby now! I felt a huge burden lift off, and settled into ‘relief’ knowing that after all this time I would be meeting my baby. I spent a moment with Matt to be excited, and took Janine’s advice to rest while waves were spaced out. I thought to myself ‘I will need this rest, because soon there will be no stopping this labour’...

However as the sun began to rise, my waves completely stopped. I fell asleep leaning over the couch, with my mum gently massaging my back. When I woke up - Janine reassured me that this was normal. Our protective primal instincts tend to keep labour and birth for the night time, where our melatonin levels peak, thus increasing our love and labour hormone (oxytocin). From one midwife to another, we agreed that it was likely my oxytocin levels would increase with the sun going down again in the afternoon, and that labour should pick up again at that time. So my birth team went away, although stayed on ‘standby’ ready for the call to say labour had started again.

That day felt as though it lasted an eternity. Although I knew resting was probably what my body needed, I couldn't keep still for all that long. I took walks, went up and down the stairs, prayed, cried, felt defeated, still hoped, did all the things to encourage oxytocin to increase. Despite all my efforts, my waves stayed small and far apart. I was back to the familiar braxton hicks waves. My baby wasn’t ready to come earth-side just yet.

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Labour Part Two

Thursday the 17th of September - 39+3 weeks pregnant

Fast forward to 10 days later, and still no sign of a return to established labour. I had been consistently having the same braxton hicks waves, but now they felt SO LOW and SO STRONG. There were 3 nights where waves had increased so much that I was back in my labour zone - rocking around with my TENs machine, getting lost in my peaceful labour music… but like the first time, they always fizzled out. I was exhausted from my body’s constant work to get my baby lower and lower still. Matthew was exhausted from sleepless nights and the anticipation of “is it happening now?”.

Janine came for a home visit on the Thursday morning. Since I had been in this long early labour, she suggested an internal exam might give us an idea of what was going on. We found that I was 5-6cm dilated, with baby's head well applied, and very low. “Love, this baby has to be coming soon”. I tried holding onto Janine’s words, but my feeling of absolute defeat pretty well brushed it off. I can honestly say that I believed my baby would never come at this point. Nevertheless, Janine did some accu needling on points that encouraged labour, massaged my tired body, and left.

I called Matt who was on his second last day of work... “when you get home we’re doing everything to get this baby coming” were the words that spilled over the phone through my frustration and exhaustion. It was hot and I was bothered. We went to his parents’ place for a swim. I can’t believe I went swimming in the pool, in a bikini, whilst 5-6cm dilated! HA! The things we do.

We came home and with nightfall and a bit of romance - things started to change (thank goodness). The waves picked up again and I was back in my gorilla pose with the TENs machine on. It was about 10:00pm. Matt tried to time my waves, to which I became VERY defiant. I insisted he didn’t time them because it “wasn’t the real thing” and our baby was “never actually going to come”, and “it always stops when we start the timer”. (He managed to catch a sneaky couple.) Things were moving very fast. I snuck away to our walk-in-wardrobe. I had pulled all the pillows from the bed and made a sort of nest. I knelt on all fours while Matt stroked my forehead and tried to gently assure me that this was it - that I was going into labour again. He encouraged me and held my space so, so well. And although I didn’t quite believe him yet - that’s where the long awaited change happened. Tucked away in the quiet of our wardrobe I believe I began to transition from dilating, to fully dilated.

It was about 10:30pm. I very quickly became uncomfortable, and looking back I had such intense pressure from baby’s head descending. My body went from the long first stage of labour to intense transition in what felt like only minutes! Matt had asked a few times if I could feel pressure in my bottom, to help guide him as to when to call Janine. I kept saying “I don’t know!” which soon changed to “whose idea was it to homebirth?” and “get me to the hospital I NEED an epidural” and “I need something for these waves!” as well as several “I can’t do this” and “ARGHHHH!”...It’s safe to say I was a noisy “transitioner”, and in fact what my body and my baby now needed, was to birth.

I paced all over the bedroom and living room - in and out of my birth space - still fully convinced that I wasn’t in established labour and that, like every other time, it would soon phase out. I couldn’t get comfortable anywhere and nothing was aiding the intensity of the waves. The TENs machine came off and in desperation I tried hopping in the shower - knowing full well that the hot water would soon run out. Although at that moment I didn’t know it - I was minutes away from meeting my baby boy.

Matt had called Janine once earlier in the evening, and quickly realised he needed to call again. Janine recalled that she only had to hear him say “ummmm. Janine!…” over the phone, before she was in the car racing to make it to us on time.

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Beautiful Birth

Friday the 18th of September - 39+4 weeks pregnant

The clock ticked over to Friday. Janine arrived at 12:15am. I remember looking up from the floor of the now lukewarm shower and telling her that I couldn’t do it. Just moments later, my body started to push. I stood up and said “WHAT WAS THAT!?” I was now truly in the second stage - after 11 days!

After a couple of pushes on all fours, while leaning over the mattress, we moved into the living room. Janine explained my waters were still intact and that baby was coming en caul (born in its sac). I longed for the pool, which poor Matthew had managed to only just fill to the minimum line…. (My champion man managed to juggle his transitional birthing wife, fill a pool with no hot water and instead use urns and cart them up and down the stairs, prepare the birth space, put on music and diffusers, call the midwife, call the photographer, update my mum, keep me calm, run out to the car in the middle of the night to grab my notes, move the car to allow Janine to park closer by… oh dear…He was absolutely incredible and I’ll forever be in awe).

I stepped in the birth pool and immediately felt a weight lift off me and a sense of calm settle all over me. Janine encouraged me to reach down between my legs and feel the bulging waters surrounding my baby. It was at this point that I FINALLY believed I was about to birth.

My waves spaced just enough for me to catch my breath and take a moment's rest. Pushing felt amazing. Finally something to do with all the intensity inside of me. I felt powerful. I felt like “I can SO do this”, once again. I finally found my zone after the wildness of transition that had previously taken over. I found Matt’s gaze and gathered my strength to keep birthing my gorgeous baby.

Very soon my baby’s head was born, and my waters broke. I could feel his nose and his ears. Lost in the oxytocic “labour land,” I talked to Matthew and Janine about what I could feel with a smile across my face.

And then - after all the waiting - I birthed my baby boy. I had so longed for this moment and here we were. I was holding my firstborn in my hands….

However - it would be a hot second before I could take it all in….

Our baby came forward all tangled up in his cord. We now knew why he needed a long and slow early labour: to gently come down into the world. It was hard to bring him to my chest and I accidentally dunked him a couple times in an attempt. He cried and spattered, but it was important that he was untangled quickly. With Janine coaching me, I stood up, and with what is called the “somersault maneuver” we untangled my little sweetheart from the long cord that had sustained him all his life. Mid untangling I looked down to see that we had a boy! A boy! I had a baby boy!

Within 30 seconds he was untangled, crying, breathing well, and up on my chest. I slowly sunk back down into the pool - precious baby boy in arms. Matt embraced us and our special moment was really, finally happening.

Owen was born at 12:52. Although it was a very long first stage of labour, it was a fast second stage, and a fast birth. But the rest then followed peacefully and slowly.

We stayed in the pool as long as it was warm (the water was on the cooler side, understandably) and then moved to the mattress on the floor to enjoy those first hours after birth - our fourth stage. Our second midwife Chantelle quietly joined our birth space, after she too had raced over to our home once receiving the call that I was about to birth. I birthed my placenta leaning over little Owen. Thankfully by this time Hannah had arrived and I am so thankful for the photos she captured! My poor uterus took a moment to recover from the intensity of what had just happened. Janine and Chantelle soon stopped the extra bleeding with the help of some raspberry leaf tea, uterine massage, and synthetic oxytocin. Whilst receiving some suturing, I breastfed Owen for the first time. It all felt so surreal. As a student and professional midwife, I had always admired breastfeeding women and jealously watched brand new mums connect with their newborn babes with the breast. Now it was my baby, my breasts. Unreal.

I recall that around this point in time I “came back” to reality a bit and started to process what had just happened. In my mind I had been labouring for hours and hours before birthing. I estimated about 6. I took a long time to settle after learning that it had only been 2.5 ish hours. I was a bit in shock. I asked for my glasses. It took forever for me to realise why everything was a bit blurry (oxytocin does hilarious things to our brains). Placing them on I saw my baby clearly for the first time “you look so much better in HD” I sighed, into his gorgeous little face nuzzled within my arms.

Looking back, those first few hours after birth were like walking through a dream. Matthew held his son for the first time as I had the fastest shower of my life, (the hot water was back by this time - hooray!) not wanting to miss anything of my baby and my husband.

Owen was weighed and measured gently by Janine, and before long she had tucked the three of us back into bed. Chantelle made sure I was fed delicious chicken soup that mum had made and sipped on so much raspberry leaf tea to keep my uterus contracted. Matt snuggled up beside me, and Owen cuddled up to my chest. We stayed like that - in our new family cocoon - right through the day and until the next. Our family had just been born. What followed for Matthew and I was the beginning of our adventure into parenthood together. We embarked on our fourth trimester, with our beautiful, beautiful boy.

As I finish writing this memoir of our birth story...Owen is asleep beside me, a 9 week old chunky boy… Matthew is back at work, adjusting to life as a new Dad...Pudding (our cat) is asleep at my feet, rather desperate for a pat these days...and I’m falling in love with the beauty of birth all over again, only this time not as a woman, or as a midwife, but as a mum.